1. What if I'm not any good at this?
Obviously, I wouldn't be doing this if I hadn't gotten really great feedback on my baking so far. But that doesn't stop the doubts from sneaking up some times - I mean, when I think about it, my biggest fans so far have been Trev, the kitty, and the guys at the plant. Let's be honest, Trev can't say anything bad - he wouldn't dare. And I'm pretty sure the guys at the plant would eat anything you put in front of them. The kitty, on the other hand, has an impeccable palate, so I know his opinion is legit.
Anyways, I hope all of the rave reviews have been real and the people who have told me "you should open a bakery!" over the last year have really meant it. It's still a little scary to go from doing something with very black and white answers to doing something completely creative and subjective.
2. Depending on someone else to support me.
I want to be really clear here that this is not a comment on Trevor's ability to support us - I don't doubt that at all. But for anyone that knows me, I am a control FREAK with multiple other neuroses. I think that me being able to step back and trust him to support us financially will be the first big challenge of our marriage. But we've been talking about it nonstop and I think he is ready to let me be a crazy person about it, and I'm ready to try my hardest to relax and trust in what I already know - that he is going to be a wonderful husband and provider. So I think we will be able to find a way to handle this big change - but it's still scary! And on a side note, he did this exact same thing two years ago when we moved here for my job - quit his job and moved to another state to be with me. I've always been grateful (we couldn't take the long distance much longer) but now that I am in the same position, I am way more impressed with him doing that for our relationship.
3. Being the oldest person in all my classes.
This might seem silly, but I'm actually pretty nervous about this one. Granted I'm still pretty young, but I'm just picturing walking into a class full of 18-year-olds and feeling completely out of place. When I went to pick up my tools at the campus bookstore yesterday, I think I was the only person who wasn't there with their mom.... I guess this is a hazard of going to a regular college with a culinary program instead of a strictly culinary school, but I hope I can find a way to relate to my classmates and even make some friends.
4. Losing the fun in baking.
I love baking. I love finding new recipes, making a huge mess in the kitchen trying them out, and then eating and sharing my experiments. But I'm nervous that between school and hopefully working part-time in a bakery, it'll turn into just work and no fun. I'm pretty sure I love it enough to do it all day every day, but it's definitely not the same as a hobby. I'll just have to find ways to keep it fun and not let it turn into a chore.
5. Gaining 100 pounds.
This one's pretty self-explanatory. We are really going to have to watch ourselves with the whole eating-the-homework part of this.
Ok, got it out of my system. Hope this didn't come off as too negative, I am absolutely excited about my decision and can't wait to get started. But I would be lying if I said I was sure 100% of the time that I am making the right choice.
And on a brighter note, I've been going through old pictures to try to find some of my all-time favorite recipes. Here's a few I've found so far!
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